Real talk: I’ve become a bit of a spoiled brat, and it took this year of everything I know as normal being stripped away from me to realize it. I’m so fortunate to live a very charmed and privileged life, and have taken so many amazing things in my life for granted while I’m always in the pursuit for more. So I decided I was going to start being more grateful, that I was going to work as hard as I could and force myself to be a thankful person. That didn’t work. I just started gripping things tighter and carrying around this heaviness of guilt that I’m not as thankful as I should be all while putting my focus on the things I wanted but didn’t have.
I’m learning that gratitude is light, it’s not forceful. It’s shifting your mind to stop focusing on things you don’t have, but to be present in each moment with the blessings you do have. Easier said than done, but as always I’m on the journey.